Marriage counselor

by **Kon** » 02 Apr 2007, 06:52

The husband and wife go to a counselor after 15 years of marriage.
The counselor asks them what the problem is and the wife goes into a tirade listing every problem they have ever had in the 15 years they've been married. She goes on and on and on.
Finally, the counselor gets up, goes around the desk, embraces the woman and kisses her passionately.
The woman shuts up and sits quietly in a daze.
The counselor turns to the husband and says "That is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do that?"
The husband thinks for a moment and replies, "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but I can't on Fridays, I play golf."

by **Sweet Sue** » 02 Apr 2007, 16:51

Great stuff Kon!

by **Joanie** » 02 Apr 2007, 21:17

by **MacDuff** » 02 Apr 2007, 23:18

by **Dave** » 03 Apr 2007, 21:53

Hole in one - or "birdie"? Puts a whole new interpretation on the phrase so beloved of our American cousins whilst watching golf ( like it affects anything) ..... "In the hole, in the hole " !

ops:

by **MacDuff** » 05 Apr 2007, 05:38

Yeah man, after six years of Dubya they really are in the hole, financially, morally and ethically

by **Dave** » 06 Apr 2007, 15:30

Oi ! MacDuff ! Since when did "financially, morally and ethically" have anything to do with a politician - any politician - regardless of nationality.
They are all just "snouts in the trough"
A majority of them have never done "a proper job" to pay enough taxes towards the cost of their stupid "I know better than you", that their cretinous behaviour demands.
Did you ever see the quote about Tony Bliar ( mis-spelling deliberate (with proof)) " "This generation could be the firste one never to send it's sons to war" !
How many has he sent the P.B.I. into ? Go count 'em, pal ! And the supporters of Bliar still call Maggie Thatcher a "warmonger" for Operation Corporate !
Pass the sick-bag, Alice !
His political legacy - corrupt government, ministers who cling to power in the face of proof about their incompetence and corruption, and re-appointment of people who should have faced criminal charges.
Oh! Also the small matter of tens of thousands of dead people in cemetaries across the U.K., Middle East and Canada !
Oh I wish I had a subscription to The Guardian in order to cancel it for supporting the mendacious, morally bankrupt git! No wonder he is thinking of taking his wife's religion (allegedly) - one confession, clean slate !

by **MacDuff** » 07 Apr 2007, 05:16

Yes Dave, I think the best word to describe Bliar is unctuous. :evil:

But we here used to get understandably confused with the name of a Prime Minister named Chretian. Although born in Quebec, French speakers said that his English - a language which he mangled - was better than his French :twisted:

You know the saying "Some people do 'ave 'em" It seems that we all 'ave 'em. Good question, in a silent auction, how much would people offer for Dubya. :idea:

by **Dave** » 13 Apr 2007, 22:52

I'll swap Bliar and Brown ( and all their little performing monkeys) for a photograph of George Junior going over Niagara in a pair of boxer shorts and a barrel ! Shown live in this station with Ed Murrow doing the commentary - then it may prove to be true !
And what about another of America's finest - The Chappaquiddick Kid ?
If he's your mini-cab driver when you next have a night out, get the bus !

by **MacDuff** » 19 Apr 2007, 07:07

Still no offers for Dubya

I'll give one U.S. $ for the photo of him going over Niagara (Canadian side) in the barrel :geek:

by **Richard** » 19 Apr 2007, 11:05

Why waste a perfectly good barrel?

by **Dave** » 23 Apr 2007, 22:09

Oh come on, Richard - support a good cause, for heaven's sake ! It's only a barrel ! :twisted:

by **MacDuff** » 23 Apr 2007, 22:19

Thank you Dave for the support

Surely Richard, you would rather see a Dubya filled barrel than send it over empty :?:

by **MacDuff** » 23 Apr 2007, 22:24

Oh, I forgot to say that we here have the dubious advantage of access to U.S. television channels. Lo and behold, only yesterday a regular TV host was responding to some almost world wide condemnation of U.S. gun laws by saying "We here in the U.S. have the tightest gun laws in the world." :idea:

Still resistant to sacrificing the barrel Richard :?:

by **Richard** » 23 Apr 2007, 23:13

I meant that you should send the subject of the experiment without the possible protection of the barrel. The photograph would be much clearer. I'll even send Dave a free copy of today's Grauniad.

by **MacDuff** » 27 Apr 2007, 19:27

Let's be fair fellows and give poor Dubya a chance

If we send Cheney, Rumsfeld and company over first, they can prepare a reception for the subsequent arrival of the

supreme commander. Perhaps a barrel of Bushmills would be appropriate :geek:

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